Is time spent in the valley a time of boredom and simply plowing through until one reaches the beauty of the distant mountains? Or are the flatlands a time of ease and rest before you come to the rugged heights? Is it better to keep your eyes fixed on the horizon of a distant goal, or is it better to stay focused on the place where you are, even if it’s not so glamorous?
How would you describe your current location in your life’s journey?
I’m 64 years and 7 months old. I have a demanding and low paying job which does give me the blessings of meaningful work and health insurance. My partner is an artist who grows much of our food; her Social Security pays for her Medicare with little left over. I am struggling daily with longing for retirement, to be out from under the pressure, to have more time to do things I enjoy. I can’t afford to start drawing Social Security until I age in at 66.
Describing where I am at on life’s journey as a place is a good challenge. The most optimistic description I can come up with is that I am slogging across a the wide, windy and rolling plains with hope of simply reaching here, home in the beautiful Ozarks.
I’ve had at least one – and usually many – major life change every year for the last twelve years. At the same time, I often feel like I’m not getting anywhere. I suppose I’d describe it as rushing on the interstate and always getting the wrong exit and so driving in circles, miles from where I need to be, while everyone else is calmly driving toward an actual destination, quite possibly on a much more scenic road. I have made progress, I am at a better place than I was at thirteen, but I’m often still bitter and frustrated with the road I’m taking.
I think I do too much of looking towards a distant goal. That type of vision has allowed me to make important changes, but it’s also frustrated me a lot because one goal after another has been torn away from me. Staying focused on where I am would help with that. Then again, I’m not at a particularly pleasant place right now, so looking for a solution, a way out, is the only thing in ways of hope. I don’t know. Probably I need a balance – one thing I’m not so good at.