As good people, kind people, people of faith, we learn to be cooperative and kind and understanding. But when systems are broken, a faithful response—a response based in understanding—might better be flat-out resistance and refusal to go along.
When have you chosen the good by refusing to cooperate?
I’m not sure when I have done that, but you have inspired me to remember to do it in the future whenever political comments become uncivil. Whether the speaker is or is not of my political persuasion, if s/he gets nasty, I will first attempt to rephrase the statement. If that doesn’t work, try to change the subject. Last resort, walk away. At any point, if questioned or challenged, I will try, as nicely as possible, to explain that it’s not about whether or not I agree, but rather, that how we express things makes a difference in many ways: nasty comments trigger nasty responses; they don’t change anyone’s mind, but they keep speaker and listener mired in negative energy, thus negatively affecting attitudes and even health.
As a member of a small church congregation, I often find myself asked to be on several committees, attend a lot of meetings, and to do a lot of things, all at the same time. Some of these I do not care for and sometimes it’s with folks I don’t particularly care for. So, unless my heart is in it and I can give a project my best effort, I have learned to just say no.
So how is this for the good? First, it gets one out of one’s own ego-thinking “They have to have me.” The job usually gets done anyway. Second, it allows room for someone else who may really enjoy getting involved. And, third, it may illuminate the fact that some things are just not possible in the now with without more support.
I very kindly refused to my draft board to be inducted into the Armed Forces of the United States of America in 1969. I didn’t claim CO status. I learned the laws better than my draft board and blocked them after they sent me an Order to Report for Induction. No lies, no arguing, no going to Canada, no serving during a misguided war.