The dissolution of our covenants, whether in divorce or the end of less intensely personal relationships, is often the result of our disillusion—realizing that someone is quite different than we had imagined. Sometimes things change. Sometimes we choose fantasy over a clear-eyed view. Sometimes people actively mislead us. But covenants break when it turns out that the nature of the agreement was not what we thought.
How have you been disillusioned in a relationship?
Over the years I have maintained a personal relationship with a friend with whom I worked professionally for 18 years. After my retirement, she continued her work there until her choice to leave that position. We have kept in touch in the same community and, since she has a new full time position here, we are limited to spend social time together. Another factor is her very emotional response to political issues which I understand but find any mutual discussion between us to be very difficult. She sends e-mails with information only and when I respond with my opinion, rarely do I receive a response. She considers me one of her “best friends” I believe. Even though I continue being together with her on occasions that suit her, I find that my emotional feeling of mutuality as friends is tenuous and at times, downright uncomfortable. I accept this relationship but with reservations.